Walking with Christ
There were clear points I was fixating on as I began the recollection process with the asynchronous module and continued to the synchronous proper. My gifts and crosses had been specified well before the semester had started, as they should since I had been contemplating this idea of “vocation” as far back as the first lesson I had on it in high school. But all of those thoughts seemed to vanish when I heard [the priest’s] homily and this question: “How far will you walk for Christ?”
The idea of “walking for Christ” is an interesting one. It’s a common image in many religious books I have read and meditated on before. Even more so that I love walks—I walk daily with my dogs and then at times with my mom for another hour; sometimes I would hike with my dad for three hours; most days I walk alone until it is too hot or too dark to continue. I believe myself to be able to walk for countless hours especially if the need arises, so to be asked how far I can walk for something—Someone—felt at first ridiculous until I took it seriously.
My experience has always been that I could walk only as far as my companion can do so or until time permits. In my mind, I have yet to reach my limits. I have only met those that are external to me. Still, in the midst of this hubris, I know I have my own. If I were to go out and walk until I experienced my boundaries today I know sooner or later I would have to go home with either blistered soles or a stomach too hungry whether I like it or not—limits, one way or another. I do not know what would make me go on and on in walks; usually, I just know when I should stop. I have had walks where my only goal was to solve a problem and I would instinctively walk back once I have done so. What would happen if I were to walk for something endless, someone limitless?
Thinking about the possible answer brings me back to the gospel of feeding the five thousand. When I read the story during the asynchronous module, I wrote this in my journal:
In a time of economic crises—a time of scarcity, the illusion of scarcity—Jesus says to have as much as you want (not just need… need for survival but think beyond survival) and there would still be more than enough for you and everyone else. The love of God goes further than anything the material world could comprehend.
I think I may have been looking at the earlier question the wrong way, focusing on “the limits” of Jesus and how I could ever be able to cope with that. The keyword could instead be will. What do I will? What am I willing to do?
A voice tells me that wherever that is, Jesus would willingly, lovingly, truly walk for and with me. If I were to take the invitation to go out and walk, He would be there and even beyond. Because He has no limits and so I can freely explore mine within the safety of his companionship. More than that, perhaps the call really is to go beyond those limits—most of which had been self-imposed or are illusions, as I have reflected earlier. Maybe the message I have yet to realise is this: if in Christ, there are no limits, what would I dare to do then?
There is a verse that I had held on to throughout high school and somehow along the move to college I had forgotten, but that today I am reminded of: I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, from Philippians 4:13. More than the whats and the hows of a vocation, I think the most important thing is that it is Christ who called for it and that it is His call I willingly answer. Anything else would be taken care of.
3 September 2022